As part of my healing process, I am writing this. For anyone who has gone through sexual trauma, I wish you healing and peace. I hope you will become empowered from my experience.

On March 9, 2019, I went to my massage appointment just as I always had with my masseuse, Jason. I usually book a 1.5 hour relaxation massage but they had a 2 hour one so I took that one instead. I usually go with my husband but he wasn’t available so I took my sister to go get one also. I had been going to Jason for almost 3 years with no incident but this time, it was different. The massage started out the same as usual but then towards the last 15 minutes, he pressed his hands over my breasts. There was no accident about it as he continued to fondle me and I tried to use my hand to let him know that I was awake but he brushed them off and continued anyway. I was frozen and my heart was beating outside of my chest. I didn’t know what to do or think, was this really happening to me? I waited until the ordeal was over to where I could go to the front and report him. He acted as if nothing happened after the massage and as soon as I saw light in the reception room, I went up to the receptionist and asked for the manager or owner as soon as possible. I could tell she was flustered as she probably wasn’t expecting me to say that. A couple of minutes had passed and I didn’t want Jason to see me so I told another receptionist that I needed a manager or owner now. She made a call and took me outside to ask what was going on and all I could get out was my tears. I wailed and I wailed as I told her what had just happened to me. She hugged me and assured me that the owner was on their way to the spa.

I waited in the car while telling my sister and we both just became lifeless. The owner showed up and called to see where I was and I pointed her over my direction. I cried again and she told me that she was sorry and that she would dismiss him immediately and take him off the floor. She advised me not to call the cops but to put in a complaint against his massage license. After that ordeal, I decided to call the cops because I needed to document this tragic event. The cops showed up and it was two male officers. They took my statement but didn’t seem too focused on my situation. One of the officers was so casual, they commented on how annoyed they were that people kept texting them. I just went through a sexual assault and he was complaining about his texts – I was floored. They entered the salon to speak with the owner and Jason and came out to tell me that he denied everything so they weren’t able to make an arrest. I wailed and I screamed because I could not believe it. The officers didn’t care to call in any forensics to swab my breasts for massage oil or fingerprints and left us with a piece of paper to send to a detective to evaluate my case. I never felt so empty. We didn’t hear anything for two weeks and I sent in the paperwork for the district attorney to file criminal charges and prosecute Jason but they denied my case and stated that there was a lack of evidence. My heart just sank, I did everything by the book but yet nothing happened. I felt robbed of justice because I didn’t want Jason to do this to anyone else. I wasn’t going to stop. I also filed a complaint against his massage license with the State of Florida and they found cause to move forward to revoke or suspend his massage license. I was hopeful that I was going to stop Jason from doing this to anyone else. I decided not to pursue a claim with the business since they terminated him and was going to file a civil lawsuit against Jason. It wasn’t until I spoke with an attorney who asked if he was still working at the salon and I said I was sure he didn’t since the owner said she was going to let him go but I decided to call 5 months later and sure enough, he was still working there. My heart just sank, I couldn’t believe it.

I knew then what I had to do and that was to file a civil lawsuit against both the business and Jason. I was not going to let them both get away with this. After filing my lawsuits, I realized how slow the justice system is. You only meet every 1-2 months and it’s about proceeding with the lawsuit and then you wait another 1-2 months to meet again. It was draining but I was willing to risk it all because it was worth fighting for. I was grateful enough to have a boss who allowed me to go to my court dates and to keep fighting my cause. 

It’s been almost two years and I am still waiting on the State of Florida to push a hearing on his massage license and my civil lawsuit is still going with no new updates. I called the State of Florida to ask if Jason was still allowed to work if there is a case pending against him and they said he was able to still work. I just couldn’t believe it. No one seemed to want justice more than me as the attorneys weren’t pushing hard enough and I didn’t know if it was even worth fighting for anymore.

Now I understand why sexual assault victims do not come forward. Oftentimes, their experiences are dismissed/discredited or they have to go to court so many times that they can’t risk losing their jobs. We have to come up with a better system to help these victims. There has to be better training for our police officers and government officials. Nothing is more invalidating than going through something like this and nothing being done about it. 

To this day, I still have PTSD from my trauma. It usually happens at night and it keeps me awake. I think about the situation over and over in my head and what I could have done instead. My husband reassures me that I reacted correctly and that I should have never been put in such a situation. My mental health counselor also validates that as well. It’s hard not to think about it and the what if’s but I know that I must look forward because I cannot change the past.

To my victims, continue being strong. Do not let your abuser win. We will receive our justice, whether here on Earth or in Heaven. Do not be discouraged. I am with you, we will continue the fight and get through this together. Do not lose hope. We have so many reasons to keep moving forward, I hope you never stop.

Sincerely,

Melissa Lee

The following experience is solely based on my own account with my designated hospital. I am writing this to inform first time parents of what they can expect and how they may avoid an experience like mine. 

I never knew such joy and love could exist with my newborn baby boy. I never imagined loving a little human being so much. I am truly grateful to my God for blessing our family and I will never take it for granted. I couldn’t imagine my life without him and I love him so much. 

I also never knew that the experience throughout it all would be quite the opposite feeling. My water broke at 2:00AM and we were headed on our way to the hospital. I was in labor for almost 20 hours before I delivered my baby boy within 40 minutes. He was a healthy, full-term baby weighing at 7lbs and 8oz. The NICU was there to make sure he was crying when he was delivered because he had a bowel movement while I was in labor. Thankfully, everything went well and we were expected to leave the hospital in 24 hours. We were wheeled into the postpartum recovery room and had two nurses tend to us. Three hours in and one of the nurses voiced their concern for my baby’s body temperature. It was 97 and they needed it at 97.5 and called for the doctor. My husband and I looked at each other with such worry that we didn’t even know what to think. The doctor came in and told us that they will need to take him into the NICU to raise his temperature and run some tests. They also told us that because his temperature was low, he couldn’t eat and that made his blood sugar low so that was another reason to take him into the NICU. My baby wasn’t even a day old yet and they’re taking him from me! I cried because I didn’t know what to do so I sent my husband with them to protect our child. The next time I saw my baby boy, he had wires all over him and they put an IV in his hand. They did this to my baby because his temperature was low and would rather not just put him under a heater to bring his body temperature up. I couldn’t stop crying because I couldn’t be with my baby and he was already in pain that I couldn’t shelter him from. Our baby was a healthy, full term baby and yet, they took him to the NICU. The NICU was mainly for babies that were preemies. Our baby was the only full term baby there, I didn’t understand it.

The NICU experience was a horrible nightmare. They pricked his feet every hour to check his blood sugar and it made both of his feet turn purple after 2 days. They also did it when he slept so he would wake up screaming. The IV in his hand kept scratching his face and I felt so helpless. They had fluids running through his IV every 3 hours, I wondered if his body could withstand it. We couldn’t leave for two more days because the lab tests wouldn’t come back until then. Thankfully, I wasn’t in too much pain and my husband was able to wheel me back and forth from the recovery room to my baby’s NICU room. Everything that was normal was no longer normal and it seemed like the hospital staff was finding every excuse to keep my baby there. After two very long days in the hospital, all the tests came back negative. We were finally able to go home but not without repercussions. For weeks at home, my baby would wake up crying and screaming, just like he did when they would prick his feet when he was sleeping at the hospital. The experience for me was horrifying, I forgot that it was traumatizing for him as well barely being a few days old. I was just so glad to have him home where I could protect him.

Just when I thought it was all over, the bills started coming from the hospital. It wasn’t too bad at first, it was about $1,500 after insurance which I expected and I thought that was the end of it. A few weeks later, I received another bill from the hospital for my recovery room stay and it totaled $19,000 after insurance! There was no way so we re-submitted to my insurance to review and they eventually paid $14,000 leaving us with $5,000 – which was still way more than we anticipated so we paid that and thought it was all done. Not even a week later, we received a bill for my baby! It was for his NICU room charges and that total $21,000! We spoke to insurance and they paid $16,000 of it leaving us with $5,000 to pay. It was insane! We looked at the total breakdown of all the bills and it was the rooms that costs the most! They were 90% of the bill! It was no wonder they wanted to keep us and baby there. We paid more than $10,000 out of our own pockets and I have no more hope in the medical systems. 

I write this to all first time parents to challenge what the doctors at the hospitals tell you. Please choose a pediatrician before you go into labor because they will help give you a second opinion at the hospital – they can be trusted. I don’t want anyone to go through what I did – physically, mentally, emotionally, and financially. 

Yours Truly,

Melissa Lee